Saturday, January 14, 2012

Reflection

It has been so long since I have blogged, but I am feeling quite sentimental and felt that my daughter's upcoming birthday would be an excellent excuse to begin blogging again. Our lives have been such a whirlwind and I won't give you the rundown of our life; however, I have had several revelations about my daughter that I wanted to put out there. I have been reading so many stories of family and friends who are dealing with children who have special needs. This is startling to me and at one point I would have blamed God for all of this. Now that I have had my little rose for almost six years, I no longer view it in this way. There are several things that I believe God has shown me about those who are given children like my daughter. I do believe we were chosen.
1. As a high school teacher, I am constantly seeing young, teenage girls getting pregnant and having perfectly "normal" children. They drink Mountain Dew and eat unhealthy foods, but their children are fine. I, on the other hand, avoided all of the "taboos" in my pregnancy and I was given my daughter. There was a time when this would have angered me, and it did, but I thank God daily that she was given to us, and not a young, teenage girl who would be overwhelmed already with the prospect of having an infant, let alone one with "special needs." How hard would this be and what kind of life would my daughter have had if she had been given to someone else?
2. I'm so thankful she was born in the United States. Do you realize how many crazy countries would have completely ignored her because of her hand? The fact that her "imperfection" cannot be hidden could have put her into an orphanage or, worse, an institution. Stories have been told of children who are put away because they were not "perfect." My little ballerina would not have the opportunities she has now if she were born in some of these places. Thank you God.
3. The world we live in now is so much more "friendly" to children like K. There are movies, inspirational stories, and amazing people out there who share their struggles daily so my daughter will know she can truly accomplish anything. Something as beautiful as a dolphin with a prosthetic tail.

I have never been one to believe in coincidences and I now know that this is true. While it has been a struggle and will continue to be one, I know that my daughter is beautiful and priceless. I was once told that God thought highly of me to give me a child like K. I wasn't at a good place to accept that, but I understand the message behind it now. While I don't think God holds me higher than others, I do believe we are given a role and we are suited for that role, even if we don't believe it sometimes. Laura Story's song "Blessings" has now become my anthem. There are so many times when we can't see past the rain, but sometimes our blessings come through raindrops.